MID Message & Mail

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I N B O X

IC Voice Mail "You've reached Adam Parrish and I probably didn't want to talk right now." Mun Contact • PLURK: poetanarchy

Comments

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[ Adam doesn't get called on his bullshit very often. Either everyone around him is too busy or too involved in their own crap to notice it or he hides it good enough. Considering he's usually surrounded by teenagers, it's likely the former rather than any amount of the latter.

He doesn't say anything to contradict him, though. It's not like it matters. He stares anywhere but at Andyr. Ronan's okay. That's really all that matters. After all that happened how he feels or what damage Kavinsky really did on the back burner and he doesn't have a desire to make it front and center. ]

Kavinsky can't even stand Kavinsky.

[deconstruct]

Not surprising. [ that kavinsky can't even stand himself. it was clear enough from how he'd said he doesn't plan to live to 24, and the suicide attempt, and god, what do they do with these freaking kids? for all they've been through, they're not really kids anymore. just as andyr'd stop being one once hapsburg took him. and still, it doesn't escape him that adam's dropped the main issue here. ]

Doubt I need to say it, but the former's the healthier option. [ working through it, and yet, that's something to be done in a safe place, and this place is so far from it. he can't blame adam for not wanting to, much as it'll hurt ronan once he does, eventually, learn about this too. straightening up, andyr skims over the table next to the bed, and picks up the knife he'd given adam before, holding it out, hilt forward, to adam. ]

Keep it. Not much you can do to fight a drug, but there's always a person holding the drug first. [ it requires you to hear or see them coming, but it's at least something. ]

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[ Adam lifts a shoulder. Maybe that's true but what's there to do but just try to survive and there isn't a place for how he feels not when Ronan's already almost died because of him. He bit down on his lip as he glances at Andyr. The knife makes him uncomfortable when Andyr first picks it up which he knows is a ludicrous reaction.

He only hesitates for a moment though before accepting it. It's true. That maybe next time he'd be able to do something to defend himself but how Kavinsky had attacked him had been impossible to predict or defend against. He wouldn't really get worse would he?

He doesn't say as much. ]

Thanks.

[deconstruct]

[ he takes it, at least, and there's some part of andyr that feels somewhat satisfied with the boy having a weapon on it, though he knows, there's not much chance adam will use it. imagines adam's thinking the same thing. he isn't like him and ronan, doesn't fight as a primary instinct, and that's nothing for him to feel bad about, but maybe leaves him more likely to end up a victim.

at the same time, andyr knows his sense of these things isn't to be too trusted, given where he comes from and how it shapes his head of those who can defend themselves and those who can't. he can't apply the same to these boys. ]

I can teach you how to use it. [ andyr offers, either way, because all he knows about feeling more in control of yourself is training your body, and becoming capable. it's a false sense of security, he knows, but sometimes the balm works. ] If you want.

and then he sees andyr and ronan and avoids andyr instead

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[ Adam blinks at the offer. He's hesitant to accept it for more than a few reasons. He's not sure that he could really be effective. The problems that he encounters are usually ones that he can't solve with violence or a weapon. They're either something controlling him from the inside like the demon or something out of nowhere like the dart that Kavinsky had shot at him. He'd never seen it coming. ]

Sure.

[ He doesn't have a particular enough of a reason to decline after all. ]

womp wooomp

[deconstruct]

[ the acceptance actually comes as a surprise, as adam doesn't typically seem to want to be around him much, so it brings a small smile to him. maybe feeling a little more capable can do something for him, is not in terms of practical use, then at least as something solid that adam can remind himself he knows. ]

Once you're back on your feet, we'll start working on it.

[ it'll give him something to keep his mind off ronan still healing, maybe. ]

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Yeah. Okay. [ Adam agrees though he's not particularly sure how to feel about it or spending more time with Andyr. But it's not like he will have much to do while Ronan is healing and he'd probably drive everyone crazy if he just stayed by his side the whole time. ]

You'll check on Ronan?

[deconstruct]

Of course. [ andyr nods, glancing up to the tent flap he'd come into this section of the medical zone from, ronan somewhere past that in more intensive care. ]

I'll let you know if anything changes.